How to Influence People's Minds by Understanding Their Hidden Desires

How to Influence People's Minds by Understanding Their Hidden Desires



In this post you will learn:

  • Ancient strategies for influencing people
  • How to understand people's hidden desires
  • How to use people's depression as a pathway for influencing them
  • Carl Jung's concept of Anima and Animus

   

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Table of contents

  • Depression: A pathway to Influencing People's Minds
  • The Path to Influence and Power
  • Meeting Unmet Needs
  • Lessons from Joseph Weil, the Con Artist
  • Insights from Carl Jung
  • How to Recognize people's Hidden Desires
  • Conclusion

Carl Jung

"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." - Carl Jung


Since the dawn of time, only a handful of people have truly understood the secret of how to seduce and charm effectively. Today, it seems even more challenging. The harsh realities of life and the rise of social media have created barriers, making it difficult to form deep, genuine connections and understand the psychological makeup of others. This lack of connection leaves many people as ripe targets for influence.


Depression: A pathway to Influencing People's Minds

Consider this: every year, around 40,000 people in the United States lose their lives to suicide, often due to depression. Experts estimate that one in six adults will experience depression at some point. The true numbers may be even higher, as many suffer in silence, without seeking help or receiving a proper diagnosis. The causes of depression are complex, often triggered by significant life events such as the loss of a loved one, trauma, divorce, isolation, or a lack of support. Without intervention, depression can spiral into self-harm or even suicide.


One effective treatment for depression is talk therapy, which hinges on forming a conscious, positive emotional connection with another person. Here lies an exciting opportunity for those skilled in persuasion.


The Path to Influence and Power

The journey to influence and power over others may not follow the path you expect. Often, we try to impress others with our ideas, achievements, and grand promises. We believe in honesty and openly ask for favors, but this approach tends to focus all the attention on ourselves. In a world where everyone is preoccupied with their own lives, this self-centered approach makes others turn inward even more, thinking mainly about their own interests.


 

Jean de La Bruyère

Jean de La Bruyère captured this perfectly: "The true spirit of conversation consists more in bringing out the cleverness of others than in showing a great deal of it yourself; he who goes away pleased with himself and his own wit is also greatly pleased with you. Most men seek less to be instructed, and even to be amused, than to be praised and applauded."


 

Therapy session

While therapists provide talk therapy, they are not close friends or spouses. Patients cannot form deep emotional connections with their therapists. This is where you, as a skilled persuader, come in. People in today’s world are burdened with stress, worries, anxieties, fears, and unmet desires. They may have numerous friends, followers, and fans, yet still feel empty and lonely. They crave a deep, emotional connection that is often missing in their lives.


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 Meeting Unmet Needs

As a skilled persuader, you can offer what others lack: fulfillment of their unmet needs, desires, and fantasies. By doing so, you become someone they can depend on. To illustrate this point, let’s draw inspiration from two historical figures: a notorious con artist and a renowned psychologist.


 


Lessons from Joseph Weil, the Con Artist

Joseph Weil, known as Yellow Kid, was one of America's most infamous swindlers. Throughout his career, he realized a fundamental truth about human nature: “This desire to get something for nothing has been very costly to many people who have dealt with me and with other con men. The average person, in my estimation, is ninety-nine percent animal and one percent human. The ninety-nine percent that is animal causes very little trouble. But the one percent that is human causes all our woes. When people learn — as I doubt they will — that they can't get something for nothing, crime will diminish and we shall all live in greater harmony."


We humans tend to be lazy, preferring the path of least resistance. When faced with problems, we often look outward, blaming our spouses, children, or the government, rather than acknowledging our own faults. Instead of putting in the effort to change, we project our unmet desires onto others, expecting them to fulfill our emotional needs. This is where a skilled charmer can step in. By playing the role of the person who can fulfill these unmet desires, you can make others idealize you and depend on you.


Insights from Carl Jung

Carl Jung, a prominent Swiss psychologist, offered profound insights into why we are fascinated by certain people. According to Jung, these moments of enchantment are driven by the anima (for males) or animus (for females), entities within our unconscious that emerge when someone of the opposite gender captivates us. These entities are shaped by our early interactions with our opposite-sex parent.


Anima and Animus

In our early years, we unconsciously absorb both the good and bad traits of our opposite-sex parent. This bond is a mix of intense emotions: physical closeness, fascination, or unmet desires. As we grow, societal pressures push us to conform to gender roles, suppressing certain traits and burying them in our unconscious.


For example, a boy may suppress traits like empathy and gentleness to conform to masculine ideals, while a girl may suppress assertiveness and daring to fit into feminine roles. These hidden aspects, termed the anima and animus by Jung, lie deeply buried in our unconscious. When someone of the opposite sex awakens these elements, we feel an intense attraction, often resembling our parents and charged with energy, excitement, and suppressed desires.


How to Recognize people's Hidden Desires

Pay attention to:

  1. Their off-hand comments
  2. What makes them blush
  3. Their mannerisms
  4. Their behavior
  5. And their insinuations


  • Do not focus so much on people's well thought words but their off-hand comments. People will always try to deceive and cover up their weaknesses with well reasoned words.


As a master influencer, observe how the anima and animus manifest in others, especially in their intimate relationships. Pay attention to their behavior, off-hand comments, and mannerisms. These clues reveal their repressed needs and desires. By fulfilling these needs indirectly, you can gain influence and power over them.


For example, someone who appears strong and independent may be repressing a helpless, dependent side longing for care and nurturing. By recognizing and addressing these hidden needs, you can become an irreplaceable part of their lives.


Conclusion

In conclusion, understanding and tapping into the unconscious desires of others can unlock immense influence and power. By meeting their unmet needs and fulfilling their hidden desires, you can create deep, emotional connections that make others depend on you. This approach, rooted in empathy and psychological insight, can transform your ability to persuade and charm those around you.

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